Finding Love in the Dog Days of Summer

What to Do Now that Stampede is Over?

 Wow – wasn’t that a great Stampede? Is it me or did the City of Calgary take this stampede up a notch? Collectively it seemed we all had a lot of steam to blow off.

 As singles we are so lucky to have this sexually charged 10 days to play! It’s a time when everyone comes out and partakes in the fun.  For 10 days all the men put on their wranglers and their rough and tumble cowboy personas; while the women use Stampede as an excuse to go out in public with the most provocative clothing imaginable. Alcohol pours freely, inhibitions diminish with each clumsy two step and the sexual innuendo is very thick.

 But then it’s over and for as much fun as we had we know that isn’t who we really are. We aren’t “that guy”; and most of the people we meet along the way aren’t truly that wild and crazy either. But it sure was nice to meet so many available people, have fun and bask in the possibilities!

 So now what? We’ve had a week or two to get over the hangovers and burn off the calories and we are ready to go again. But where?

 Summer is the best time to meet people; probably because everyone is out and about; relaxed and our energy levels are high. We haven’t shifted into the hibernation mode yet. So it is time to get out there and look for your soul mate. I could give you dozens of ideas but what is the point of putting yourself into places where a) you aren’t having fun and b) the type of person you are looking for doesn’t hang out there? In order to find compatible singles you have to know where to look; in order to know where to look you have to know who you are attracted to. So I’m afraid you must do your homework first.

 Step 1 – What do you enjoy doing?

 This will determine how you like to spend your time; if you enjoy certain activities it follows that the people you meet with have a commonality with you.

 List everything you like to do – how do you like to spend your time? What are your passions? Your hobbies? What do you consider fun?  Take your time and think about this. Maybe make a list and add to it as thoughts pop into your head.
 

Step 2 – Where can you go?

Where can you go so that you can enjoy these activities and increase the likelihood of meeting other people who share your interest? This will may require brainstorming and maybe lots of googling.

For example if you love running then run along the river on a Sunday morning rather than in your quiet neighbourhood. Join a run group or an outdoor club. Put yourself out there.

If you like gardening then take a course, go on a tour, walk around a neighbourhood and chat with some neighbours.

Think about joining a theatre group, a hiking group. There’s an city election coming up; figure out who you would like to back and join their campaign. There are so many wonderful groups out there that would love to have you. Mr. or Ms Wonderful is out there but he/she isn’t going to just show up on your doorstep. You have to make an effort; build an interesting life and interesting people will be attracted to you.

Step 3 – Practice up on your Small Talk

So many people are afraid to approach another person for fear of rejection. No one likes rejection but keep in mind that if you are open, honest and authentic the chance that someone is outright rude is very small. Rude people come from a place of insecurity and weakness; if they are rude just ignore it and feel sorry for them. Don’t be overly anxious – you are just out to make friends. Learn the art of small talk; be engaging and interesting. And remember, dating and relating is just a numbers game. You have to talk to a lot of people before you find your soul mate; so start getting yourself out there!

Where do you like to meet people in the summer time? Email me and I’ll post the best answers – anonymously of course.

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